A middle school in Birmingham, Alabama decided to try save their most at-risk children from the all too common fate of at-risk children in poor, black neighborhoods. They assigned their best teacher. They assigned an experienced police resource officer. And they called in professional help.
I was professional help in those days. I had 10 years of experience as a marriage and family therapist, extensive training in alcohol and drug abuse, sexual abuse, and many other things.
The school wanted a black professional, but the only one willing to come on a volunteer basis (without pay) had very limited experience, so I came with him to add experience and specialized training to the team. We worked together until the school fired us both about 6 weeks into the effort. Why we were not making progress is a story in itself, but I want to tell you what I learned while we were there.
Nearly every child in our group was a gang member. Our group was nearly equally divided between boys and girls and they were all in the 7th or 8th grade.
We succeeded in making personal connections with every child. They showed us joy. They showed us anger. They showed us fear. They showed us vulnerability. They showed us playfulness. I liked the kids and they liked me.
Some of the kids could be dangerous, maybe all of them under the right circumstances, but every one of them could form a relationship. They could grow up to be admirable adults, they just needed time.
They needed to spend the day in a classroom being successful, and not just being corrected for breaking rules or making mistakes. They needed rules and correction, but they needed to succeed too. They needed an afterschool program with an adult who loved them and could be with them five or ten hours per week.
Later, I found a program that was working in another poor, black neighborhood. It was at a branch of the public library. The librarian and a security guard had created a safe place for neighborhood kids to come after school. Many of the children stayed two to three hours every afternoon before going home.
The librarian called me in as a resource person to talk with the children. The children lived with more trouble than I was used to seeing in my busy clinical practice as a therapist. They needed more than they were getting, but what they had at the library was important and valuable and was making a difference.
If I encountered that program today, I would recognize the librarian and security guard as missionaries working for the kingdom of God. I would pray for them every day and I might have to volunteer several hours per week even though I am more comfortable around adults than children. Being comfortable cannot always be the top priority.
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